"I keep thinking to myself what a fool I've been" - the past week at work

Monday

August Bank Holiday.

Despite all my plans I just sat around reading and eating and sleeping.

I also drank a bottle of Californian chardonnay - no idea who gave this to me, I found it in a cupboard.

Tuesday

Horrible night.  I woke at 3.30 and for some reason was unable to get back to sleep.  Eventually I got up at 5.30 feeling exhausted but also relieved the night was over.

I went to work arriving at 7.45.  PR Officer Josie S was already in the office, looking so miserable I asked her what was wrong.  She told me she intended to apply for the vacancy in the Operations section which is managed by Director Ryan M, with whom she has been having an affair.  The affair has obviously been faltering recently, and Ryan M seems to have lost interest in Josie.  Presumably she thinks if they are working in the same department together the romance will revive.  I thought this was a desperate move and tried to gently talk her out of it, but she was very firm that she wanted to make the application and asked me to help her arrange it.

When Ryan M arrived I asked him if he could spare a few minutes, and went up to his office.  He was abstractedly sorting through things on his desk, and mentioned he felt unwell.  When I told him Josie S wanted to apply for the vacancy in his department he stopped what he was doing and looked away, his chin up in the air, thinking.  At first he told me the date for applications was closed (which must be true since the interviews have been taking place).  I firmly told him that Josie S needed the courtesy of an interview.  I had to almost insist on this before he agreed.

Later that morning Josie S submitted an application form and an interview was arranged for her.  Ryan M and HR manager Jasmin S were to do the interviewing.  I warned Josie that she might be rejected, but she told me that it might clarify things for her.

The interview was held just before lunchtime in Jasmin's office.  Afterwards I asked Josie how it had gone.  She said it had not gone well ("I think I might have sounded pathetic"). 

Early afternoon she was told she had not got the job.

Only Josie S and myself in the Marketing department in the afternoon.  I felt exhausted from lack of sleep and she was obviously moping ("I keep thinking to myself what a fool I've been").  At four o'clock I told her to go home, and then went home myself.

Wednesday

News that Felix S, Research manager, had got the job in the Operations department.  This totally astounded me, since not only is it a step down for him it was also completely unexpected.  When I asked him why he wanted the job he told me working for Tom D (our boss in Communications) was too much of a roller-coaster.

I worked with my deputy Meryl P during the morning.  We told jokes and made each other coffee.  Later a meeting with Tom D and he told me he was planning to have Felix S's new appointment annulled.

Thursday

I got up at 5am, the morning fresh and cool.  After a cup of tea I drove northwards for about three hours, eventually arriving at a concrete university campus for a public sector conference (just marketing personnel who mostly worked for NGO that mostly worked for the government).  The first person I met (that I knew) was Felix S and we went into the opening session together.

In the mid-morning coffee break Tom D appeared, looking rather out of his depth. 

I found the conference sessions pedestrian, but also reassuring since they confirmed most of the communications strategies we have in place.

After the conference had finished for the day Felix and I went into the urban centre, but there was not a great deal to see. 

Back to the university again, and briefly I returned to student life (shoddy campus furniture, marked walls, endless confusing corridors).  I rested for a while then got changed for the conference dinner.  I was on the same table with Felix and Tom, about two hundred people in all at the meal.

After the food a fairly well-known speaker talked indiscreetly about the last government.  Felix S, slightly tipsy, told me he was a strong Conservative ("I would have followed Margaret Thatcher to the ends of the earth").  I drank too much beer, which always makes me drunk.

Friday

I had set my travel alarm clock, but did not hear it.  Eventually I was wakened by the university cleaners knocking on my door.  Hurriedly I got washed and dressed and went over to the conference sessions.

The conference was more interesting this morning (or perhaps I was paying more attention) and I made notes of some useful ideas.

I decided against going into any of the afternoon working groups, and wandered around the campus.  In the university bookshop I spent a great deal of money.  Later I showed the bookshop to Felix S and he asked me what sort of books he should read (I found the question incredible).

The final session of the conference, and then everyone dispersed.  Tiring drive home.  Not much to eat in the house when I finally got home.