By Laura Witjens, Chair
The other day I was mailing back and forward with a female patient looking for an egg donor. Normally I try not to get to involved with the daily running of the office. Not only have I got plenty of other donation issues to deal with, more importantly, Pip is so much better at all this one-to-one work.
Anyway, the reason I became involved was because of this patient’s really unhelpful belief about donation. She desperately needed an egg donor – her words not mine – but deep down couldn’t understand why women would do it. Even more so, it became clear during our communication that she actually thought that egg donors were a bit strange and possibly even needy.
Needless to say, that niggled or to be more honest, that got my back up big time. For a start it is vital to start off any journey with the belief that you’re doing the right thing and that it will end up positively. Or as Henry Ford said “If you think you can or if you think you can’t, you are right”. So true that is, isn’t it?
By sending her our own information about becoming an egg donor she could read the testimonials of women who have donated before. Women, like 2 of the trustees and myself, who donated ‘just to help’. No neediness, no conditions, no hidden dramas. Have eggs, will share. Yes, we understand the possible challenges before, during and after the process but also understand the immense pain of being childless. But we are women believing that this real pain is more important than our own possible challenges. And we don’t need to know the person to understand that pain.
I don’t think for a second that makes egg donors needy. I think that makes them exceptional human beings and I am damn proud to be one of them.
She got the point.
SEED: Sperm, Egg and Embryo Donors 
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