Poacher turned game keeper

This one takes a little explaining.

Firstly, a game keeper is not someone who looks after a game like football; he looks after animals that are hunted for food and also sport. Game birds are particular species of birds such as pheasant and grouse which are bred, sadly for them, to be shot as a game.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Game_birds

Even now, particularly in Scotland, people go on shooting holidays on the large, country estates.

Traditionally, these were owned by a Lord or Laird who employed a game keeper to manage the breeding of the birds, the shoots and to protect the birds from locals hunting them for their own needs. In the past, the methods of protection could be brutal such as iron leg traps hidden in the forest and the punishment from the local magistrate, who was probably related to the lord, would be severe.

So who is the poacher? The poacher is the one who steels and hunts on the estate.

When someone changes their role from the person steeling to the person protecting, we can say that they are poacher turned game keeper. This could be a computer hacker getting a job protecting systems.

One of the most famous examples of this was the real life confidence trickster (con man), and fraudster, Frank Abagnale, whose life was portrayed in the movie, Catch me if you can.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frank_Abagnale

Well, the FBI did eventually catch him but then they employed him! He was a real poacher turned game keeper.

The best thing since sliced bread

What's the best thing since sliced bread?

The mobile phone; the internet, the kindle maybe?

Well it would have to be pretty good to be better than sliced bread! You would think there might be something more exciting than sliced bread but no - that's the benchmark against which all new ideas are judged.

When I think of bread I think of the warm, comforting Hovis advert - voted best ad ever. It's a real village and it's tough work for the local bread delivery boy.

Near the knuckle

These are knuckles; the hard round bones where hands meet fingers.



If something is near the knuckle it means it is on the border of acceptability. It might be a joke that is rude, offensive or in bad taste.

Ricky Gervais presenting the recent Golden Globe Awards amused and offended people in equal measure. Decide for yourself if it's funny or a bit near the knuckle.

No frills

What are frills?

They are fancy, frilly things that you often find on curtains or dresses - like this:



But no frills?

This becomes an adjective to describe a product or service that is basic. The word became most synonymous with budget operators called no frills airlines like Ryan Air, Wizz Air and Easy Jet. Here many of the extras you normally get were removed to reduce the base cost of the flight to as little as possible.

Like this maybe:

Below par

How are you today, feeling below par?

Oh, I’m sorry to hear that because means you are not feeling too good.

Par is a golfing term. For each hole on a golf course, it is established how many shots should be needed to get the ball in the hole from the tee (starting point) to the hole. Most holes are Par four but shorter ones are three and longer ones are five.

Still with me?

Ok, this is where it doesn’t make sense. If in golf, you only take three shots to make a par four hole, that’s good and you are 1 under par however, in life, if you feel bad, then you feel below par and that’s not good.

Note the words below or under can be used.

We can also use another golfing metaphor, par for the course.

This describes something that is typical or expected, for example, for someone who is always late, we could say,

He’s late again.

Well, that’s par for the course!

One of the best things you can do in golf is to make a hole in one. That means just one shot. It doesn’t happen too often but when it does, it’s quite spectacular! Here's how it's done.

All the rage

Rage is usually used as a word to describe extreme anger.

You can be in a rage!!!! Grrr!

However, when something is all the rage, that’s quite a different matter.

All the rage means very fashionable and current.

We could say that iphones are all the rage now.

But what about Google Glass? It might be if it catches on. What do you think?

To put a spanner in the works

This is a spanner.

The works is another term for a machine.

What would happen if you put a spanner in the works?

It would break and stop. That's exactly what workers used to do when they needed a rest from the demanding machines that they worked with.

Becoming a slave to machinery was already a worry in the time of Charlie Chaplin.

Here's an extract from the film Modern Times.

In the middle of nowhere

Where is nowhere? Well, it's nowhere.

Where is the middle of nowhere? It's as far as you can be from anywhere.

One place in the the middle of nowhere is the Saint Kilda Islands off the north west coast of Scotland.

Gaelic speaking people lived there surviving by climbing down the cliffs to get seagull eggs. Eventually, the community nearly starved and could no longer support itself. The island was evacuated in the the 1930's.

Here's a look at the beautiful but tragic island accompanied by a rather psychaedelic song from Blur.

Cross that bridge when we come to it

But what if they are not there to meet us at the station?

What if we can’t find a campsite?

What will we do if the car breaks down?

What if we miss the ferry?

Ah, don’t worry; we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

So, in other words, we will deal with a problem if and when it arises but otherwise, we won’t think about it.

Now here's what you call a bridge and it takes a bit of crossing; Vasco de Gama Bridge near Lisbon, Portugal. It's the longest bridge in Europe at approximately 17kms (10.7 miles long)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vasco_da_Gama_Bridge

Click on the video to enjoy the ride!

How long is a piece of string?

How long is a piece of string?

This is a ball of string - that’s quite long.



This is a string vest - Hmm, let's not go there.



This is a G-string - minimal.



So just how long is a piece of string?

This is a rather annoying answer to a question somebody doesn’t know the answer to.

How long will it take?

How long is a piece of string?

Well, I hope that clear now!

This is a string puppet.



And here is a fun song from 1967 when the Royaume Unis got more than nil point and knew how to win Eurovision. Of course, that was before the eastern block countries took it over and we only had to beat Belgium!

The show must go on

With Christmas and New Year behind us, it was back to work this week.

Back to the grind, but we have to be brave, have to be professional.

You know how it is, as they say in show business, the show must go on.

That's what Freddie said when he was on his way out - a professional to the end.

The Show Must Go On!

Turn over a new leaf

Did you eat too much at Christmas? Did you drink too much at New Year?

Did you get lazy in the cold winter months and have only an expanding waist-line to show for it?

It's the time of year when people make their New Year's Resolutions and decide to turn over a new leaf.

How about you?

Here's a song from the legendary bluesman, John Lee Hooker.